Dear Presidential Candidate,
I thought you were different. I thought we had something special.
Remember a few months ago, when you promised you would take care of me? You said that you'd keep me safe, and that we'd build a life together. You said that you would find jobs for all of my friends, and take care of me when we're old. You said you'd fight for my honor whenever it was threatened. Do you remember that?
Of course I knew that there had been others, but you told me that I was the real one you wanted, and that all of those others were just diversions.
Well, the game is over now, buster; I saw you on TV with Indiana. That two bit hussy has been throwing herself at every political candidate for the past decade. You were standing there, saying all those sweet words about the economy, homeland security, and terrorist hunting that you always whispered to me before flying off on your private jet to take care of "business".
I should have known, all those supposed "business trips" were really pleasure excursions to cavort with your skanky "swing states". Well I've got some news for you buddy, not all of us want to be one of your "swinger state" call girls, cheering our lungs out when you arrive to sweep us off our feet, and then pining away every day that your gone.
I mean, whatever happened to monogamy? Am I so old fashioned to want that?
I saw your television ad yesterday, saying that I'm the one that really matters to you this November, and that you really can't go on without me. Is that what you were thinking while you were roasting buckeyes next to a romantic fire with Ohio? I didn't think so.
And don't think I'll be sitting here by myself in misery... oh no, Mr. Presidential Candidate, you may not give me my due attention now, but in four years, when the next one comes on in to lavish their attention on me, we'll see how you feel.
Every time I think that you're starting to value me for who I am, I here you talking about the value of my delegates behind my back. Do you think that's how I want to be treated?
No, Mr. Presidential Candidate, I deserve better... I deserve much better, and we'll see how you feel once I get it. Have fun when your "swing states" throw themselves at the next candidate to walk by, and you're left counting hanging chads.
Good bye, and good riddance,
Wisconsin
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